That horrible moment when a guy you had a huge crush on back in high school ended up being incredibly successful after we graduated and I moved a bazillion miles away from him. Damn it. Damn jerk being all gorgeous and successful. You know what else? He's just like how my dad was at that age.
I'd marry a guy like my dad, but hopefully he'd be a better listener and less lazy than my dad.
I wonder how the other guys I've had crushes on are doing... Watch it turn out they're all bazillionaires and here I am eating doughnuts and weeping over spending my life savings on a degree I don't even want.
Then again, when I was a little girl, I always assumed I'd grow-up to be homeless and would probably die before the age of 21. I'm 22 now, it's hard to believe something hasn't killed me yet. No car crash, no disease, no disaster... I didn't really plan on living this long. Now what am I going to do?
I still want to finish college, but I think I'll put the university on hold next year and get a certificate at a technical school to get at least a decent job that's more than minimum wage to live off of while I complete college later. That's what I should have done in the first place, because now I don't have money for the technical school considering I spent it on my tuition. Damn peer pressure. Damn people telling me what to do.
I want to drive down the street blaring Porky's themes out my windows because the whole world needs to know that The Pig King is in town!
Except he isn't, and I'm not obnoxious, and no one would recognize the song, and I don't wanna blow-out my speakers, so I can't...
I have no one outside of deviantART to share my joy with. I wish everyone would bow down to the king, but they don't know who he is...
People are ridiculously kind to me and I have no idea why. I don't dress in an approachable fashion, unless you consider all-black, a spiked collar, and buckle boots to be approachable. And yet, strangers smile back when I smile at them, they're very courteous to me. I'm not trying to say I'm some sorta special snowflake, but what I am saying is that other people like my sister and friends all complain that people are rude to them. People are very rarely rude to me, and I wonder if people really do treat me differently, or if I just have a more positive outlook which grants me the ability to notice kind deeds more easily whilst ignoring negativity. I can certainly say I have a different attitude from most people. My pals often will come up with some reason to dislike another person that I hadn't even thought of. My coworkers do this too. I admit I'm a very hateful person, but I keep it to myself. I've noticed friends and others taking joy in sharing a mutual hatred.
I can understand the appeal of that, but I find it hard to even notice something to hate about someone. Usually when I do, I disregard it as something no one else would agree with me about, so I ignore the feeling. Then I just forget about it. I suppose it's because I'm not so used to communicating anything anymore. I don't mean to put myself on a pedestal, I really am hateful on the inside. But, there's no reason to share that hatred when I could share love. Just because I hate something or someone doesn't mean everyone else should, too.
I got a perfect score on my essay, by the way.
But, I got a D on the exam. Heheh, oops.